Route 666 Page 17

  “Oh ho, someone hit a raw nerve,” Daddy said as Connie laughed harder, climbing into the back seat.”

  “Daddy, do you want to ride or walk to the O Club?” Lexie asked him pointedly.

  “All right, all right,” he said, getting in. They rode the short distance to the officer’s club in silence. Lexie sat in the car as Daddy got out. He waited for a few moments on the sidewalk, then shook his head and went inside.

  “Don’t be mad, Lexie,” Connie begged.

  Lexie sighed. “I’m not mad.”

  “Then what is it?”

  “Don’t tell him, but he said that and then I realized that I couldn’t remember if I went yesterday or not.”

  “You haven’t gone today, neither?”

  “Nope.”

  Connie laughed. “Yeah, I won’t tell Daddy, he’ll offer you some castor oil or some shit.”

  Lexie snorted as she opened her door. “Shit, really? You just had to use that word.”

  Connie looked at her over the soft top. “Yeah, I sure did.”

  “I better go and apologize to Daddy,” Lexie said.

  “Yeah, you don’t want to leave it like that. It’ll make a mark on the reception.”

  “I’ll say I’m sorry and ask him to save a dance for me,” Lexie decided.

  “Nice one,” Connie replied, opening the door. “Oh, look, they did a fab job on the tables.”

  “Very nice,” Lexie said in approval. “There’s Daddy, at the bar. I’ll be right back.”

  Connie went on into the main dining hall without Lexie. A table just inside the door held a seating chart. Lexie was seated at the high table, as mother of the bride, unlike Connie. She looked at the chart, finding her name. “Hi,” a young woman with retro cat’s eye glasses said, as she reached her assigned seat. “I’m Hetty. Hetty Unger.”

  “Hi! You were Lottie’s roomie at the Academy, weren’t you?”

  Hetty broke out into a wide smile. “Yes! I didn’t know she mentioned me.”

  “Oh, my, yes. My sister, well, Lottie’s mom, might have said your name in passing a few times. You know, after having talked to Lottie.”

  Hetty nodded.

  “I’m here by myself,” Hetty confided.

  “Oh, well, me, too, really. I mean, I traveled here with Lexie, but she’s not like my plus one, obviously.”

  “My girlfriend dumped me two weeks ago.”

  Connie didn’t know how to respond to that other than to say, “Oh. Uh, that’s terrible. Had you been together long?”

  “No, we’d only been dating four months.”

  “Still, I’m sure it hurts.”

  “Yes. It does, thank you.”

  Connie felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked up to see her father hovering. “There’s drinks at the bar, Connie, if you want to go get yourself one. I was just in there having one when your sister came in.”

  “Did she apologize to you?” Connie asked.

  “Yes, yes she did, she had come in to apologize for being so shitty. Then she went to go visit the ladies’ room, probably to poop. She’ll feel much, much better. Have more room to eat, too.”

  Hetty gaped at him. Connie colored in embarrassment. “Daddy,” she hissed.

  “What? You asked where she was. Excuse me, I need to go say ‘hi’ over there. It looks like your Aunt Myrtle showed up. I didn’t notice her at the wedding.” he moved off.

  “Sorry about that,” Connie said to Hetty.

  “It’s okay. My grandma says stuff like that. I think it’s just part of being old.”

  Chapter 27

  Red Alert, All Hands on Deck

  The sisters arrived back at their room at the lodge to find a very excited Nelson watching and waiting for them from the window. As soon as he saw the car pull up, he dashed for the door, barking excitedly.

  “He chooses now to do the dog thing?” Lexie asked in irritation. She opened the door and stepped in. “Nelson, hush that noise, you’ll get us thrown out for making a ruckus.”

  He quieted, panting in excitement.”Sorry, that just sort of came out. I think we’ve been in these bodies too long or something.”

  “What had you so het up?” Connie asked, shutting the door behind her.

  “We got him! We got him!” Nelson crowed.

  “Got who? Oh!” Connie exclaimed as who he meant dawned on her.

  “It was right here on Youtube,” Nash said. “We were sat here watching videos on your laptop and there it was, posted earlier today, too.”

  “Show us,” Lexie said. The two sisters sat down on the queen-sized bed and looked at the laptop screen. Lexie bent down to pick Nelson up.

  “We left the tab open. Just hit replay,” Nash said.

  The video was labeled, “Human pretzel drives down street backwards”. Their eyes widened as they spotted a late model Ford Pick up truck drive in reverse down a busy road. It appeared to be filmed on a phone and the footage was shaky. The footage zoomed in and they could see, through an open truck window, at a man bent in half, his torso facing so that the man was looking through the rear window. His legs were pressed against the steering wheel. He appeared to be steering with his legs.

  “How the hell?” Connie asked.

  “That should be impossible,” Lexie agreed, “But how do y’all know it’s our guy?’

  “Just watch,” Nelson said. Listen closely.”

  They strained to hear. The man seemed to be singing something.

  “Oh, man! It’s ‘Walking on Sunshine’!” Connie said in excitement.

  “Where was this filmed?” Lexie asked.

  Nelson nosed against the screen, indicating the description. “My wife and I were up at Enchanted Rock today and saw this crazy shit go down,” Lexie read aloud.

  “Where’s Enchanted Rock?” Connie asked.

  “The license plates on the truck were from Texas,” Lexie said. “and on one I could see clear enough on one of the cars.”

  Connie was already typing on her phone. “It’s two and half hours from here.”

  “He’s probably long gone.”

  “Says here it’s a state park with a campground. He might be camping there.”

  “There was a big cooler in the back of the truck,” Nelson said. “One of those red and white ones.”

  “It’s late. I know this is the first time we’ve caught wind of him, but we’ve been drinking, and dancing, and all that. We’re pooped.”

  “Well, you did. ‘Don’t go in there!’ you said. ‘I hope no one lights match near there!’” Connie giggled.

  Lexie narrowed her eyes. “Oh, hush You’re as bad as Daddy.”

  “Okay, fine,” Nelson sulked. “We’ll get up at six and go looking.”

  “Six? Are you out of your mind?” Connie asked him.

  “He’s right, if we get there before he’s likely to be up, and he’s camping there, we have a better chance of catching him,” Lexie said.

  “See? Six o’clock.” Nelson looked as smug as a chi could possibly get.

  “If we get up at six, we won’t be gone until we check out and pack up the car, so seven at the earliest. Then it’s a two and half hour drive, barring any road works or traffic problems. That’s also without stopping anywhere to get any breakfast,” Lexie informed him.

  “So we need to get up at four?” Nelson asked in dismay.

  “Hell, no. Check out here is at ten. We’re going to get up, go get some breakfast from the Subway at the shoppette Kyle told me about, then we’ll check out and go.”

  “But-” Nelson started.

  “Nelson,” Nash said, “forget it. He was trying to get our attention, singing that song. He was taunting us to come find him.”

  “Probably been laughing this whole damn time because we hadn’t,” Nelson groused.

  “Exactly,” Connie said. “”He wants to be found, I think, maybe to lead us on a merry chase. We can’t chase him if we don’t know where he’s been to follow him.”

  “Fiiiiiiiine.” Ne
lson hopped down off the bed and stalked over to the chair by the window. He curled up underneath it and closed his eyes.

  “That looks like a good idea,” Connie yawned. “I’m going to go shower first, if you don’t mind.”

  “You go on ahead,” Lexie said. “Just let me brush my teeth before you climb in. I’ll shower in the morning.”

  “Do you mind?” Nelson asked, cracking open an eye. “I’m trying to sleep here.”

  Ignoring him, Lexie walked to the bathroom vanity and took her toothbrush out of her vanity case. Connie put the laptop away and put Nash back into the habitat.

  “Do you have to make so much noise?” Nelson continued. Connie’s response was to clatter her suitcase as much as possible as she put it on the bed, opened it, and took out her pajamas. She then clicked the suitcase shut as loudly as she could, clattering the handle as she moved it back onto the floor with a thump.”Oh, nice,” Nelson said sarcastically.

  “He still being like that?” Lexie asked, coming out of the bathroom.

  “Uh huh,” Connie replied.

  “He’s always been a sore loser,” Nash said.

  “Humph,” Nelson replied.

  Lexie shook her head at his insistence on having the last word. She climbed into bed and turned the lamp off on her side. The toilet flushed, followed by the soft sounds of the shower starting up. The sound reminded her of rain and lulled her into sleep, not even Nelson’s snores keeping her awake.

  “Nope, do not talk to me until I have a second cup of coffee,” Connie said as Nash opened his mouth to say something as she fastened him into his car seat.

  Connie got into the driver’s seat and waited for Lexie to come out from the office. She didn’t have a long time to wait.

  “Alrighty,” Lex said, getting in. “That’s all taken care of.”

  “Good. We’re grab breakfast and then head out the gate.”

  Lexie gave her a tired smile. “Coffees to go?” she asked hopefully.

  “Yeah, having just the one coffee this morning isn’t gonna cut it.”

  “Order four,” Lex said. “They’ll be plenty hot and they’ll be fine in one of those cardboard drink holders on the seat.”

  “Great idea,” Connie said, backing out of the space. “One to drink and one to chase it with.”

  “Won’t you need to stop to pee?” Nash asked.

  “It’s only a couple of hours. We’ll make it until we get there,” Connie replied.

  “Yeah, it’s a state park so the visitor’s center area should have restrooms,” Lexie added. “Oh, man, we should have texted the girls and Daddy to let them know we were going and why.”

  “I did that last night when I got out of the shower. They were okay about it. They’re rooting for us, that we catch this guy when we get there and Nash and Nelson get to go back home.”

  “I hope four years won’t have gone past in our dimension,” Nash said. “The storage bill at the portal stasis facility will be astronomical.”

  “They charge y’all for that?” Connie was appalled.

  “It’s free for the first seven days, then after that, they charge you by the day. Five years max, then they turf you out to the Lost in Ether Department.”

  “And what the hell is that?” Lexie asked.

  “They presume you’re dead. If your body is occupied by an actual person, they assess if they are able to function normally after coming out of stasis.”

  “If not?” Lexie pressed.

  “No one really knows. I mean, there’s stories, but who knows how truthful they are?” Nash replied.

  “Oh, I don’t like the sound of that,” Connie said, pulling into the parking lot. “Hold on, I need to go in and order the food and coffee.”

  After she returned, they remained parked long enough to add milk and sugar to the coffees and replace the lids, then began the drive to Enchanted Rock. Connie couldn’t help but wonder what they would find there. Were they right in their assumption that the song had been a deliberate taunt, the stunt designed to gain their attention to begin with? Would he still be waiting or would he have gone, leaving them to chase after him after another video breadcrumb, only to have left once he’d been seen? She hoped not. She shuddered. The thing with Turner was bad enough, but that poor guy in the video? She hoped he was a professional contortionist or something and extremely limber. The alternative did not bear thinking about.

  Chapter 28

  Fairy Trails

  “Is that…? No, surely not.” Lexie craned her neck to see the truck that had been pulled over to one side of the entrance to Enchanted Rock. As soon as the T-bird had slowed and put on it’s turn signal to enter the park, the Ford truck had peeled out. The truck screeched to a halt, then reversed.

  “Oh shit, it is!”

  Connie had already figured that out, though, and had stopped in the entrance. “Crap, crap, crap!” Another car was in the drive, waiting to exit. “I can’t do a u-turn since that car is there. I’ll have to go up there and find a place to turn around because no way am I backing out onto the highway.”

  The driver of the truck leaned out of his window and gave a cheery way before driving away. “Argh!” she shouted. The other car in the drive pulled out. “Screw it, I’m going!”

  She executed a three point turn. “Where’d the hell he go?”

  “He must have put pedal to the metal and made it around that bend,” Lexie said.

  Connie pulled back out onto the highway. She growled and increased her speed.

  “Con! You’re going too fast!” Lexie shouted, startled.

  “That sucker is not getting away! That little wave of his has pissed me off!”

  “And I need to pee, hello, remember the coffees? Plus, you’re going to end up getting a-” a siren wail cut her off. “Ticket,” she finished lamely.

  “Fuuuuuck!” Connie smacked the steering wheel but pulled over. She schooled her expression into a polite mask and then rolled down the window. “Hello, officer.”

  “Hello. I need to see your license and registration.” Lexie was already in the glove box.

  “The registration is in here,” she said.

  “My license is in my purse,” Connie said, reaching for it.

  He watched the pair, looking unimpressed. “Do you have any idea how fast you were going?”

  After giving the requested information and looking suitably chastised, not to mention a hundred dollars lighter thanks to the ticket now burning a hole in her purse, they were back on their way. Connie was dismayed to see that they’d lost twenty minutes. The truck was nowhere in sight.

  “So what do we do now?” Connie asked.

  “He’s long gone,” Nelson says, “So I vote for lunch.”

  “Are you even kidding me? You bitched and sulked because we wouldn’t leave super early in the morning and now you want to just forget about it and go eat?”

  “Well, you need to pee, right? If you keep going just a little further, according to that sign, we'll be in Fredericksburg. I bet they have someplace good to eat that has a bathroom.”

  “I do have to go,” Lexie said, her voice rueful.

  “Me, too,” Connie said. “I’m about to burst. Fredericksburg it is.”

  A billboard came into view. “Sonic Drive-In,” Lexie read. “That’ll do. It’s a restaurant, so bound to have a restroom.

  “I see it,” Connie said a few minutes later. Both women rocketed out of the car the moment Connie turned off the engine.

  “Sorry, had to really, really go,” Connie said to a server as they hurried back to the car. She looked at Lexie as they arrived back at the car. “I thought I wasn’t going to make it all the way around the back.”

  “I know.”

  “I want a hot dog and a double cheese with bacon, onion rings, fries, and a milkshake,” Nelson announced.

  Connie ignored him and pressed the button to order. She ordered for herself and the two bounty hunters, looking questioningly over at Lexie to ask what she wanted.r />
  “Hi, yes, I’d like a chili cheese Coney,” she said.

  “What drink with that?” came the reply.

  “I’ll take a large limeade, please.”

  Their server read the order back and gave them their total.

  “You didn’t get enough to feed me,” Nelson whined.

  Connie turned around in her seat. “Look, I’m tired, I just drove a few hours on coffee fumes. After everything, I just want to eat and find a fucking motel. If y’all hadn’t seen that video, I’d only be getting up right about now. You want to bitch, I have but one thing to say to you.”

  “Shut up?”

  “No, piss off and die.” She paused, noticing too late the shocked look on the server’s face as she stood just outside holding their tray of food. “Oh, not you, sorry. I had my phone on speaker.”

  The server looked doubtful but gracefully accepted their payment. Connie winced as she took in the way he hurried away. Furious whispering broke out in the back seat.

  “Oh, all right,” Nash muttered. “Connie, Nelson here would like me to ask you to please pass his food back to him.”

  “I am tempted to say no and make him wait until we get to a motel, because once I eat, I’m going to finish crashing. But I’m better than that, so here you are. A bacon double cheese burger.” She twisted around and unwrapped the burger for him. “Easy, I like my fingers, thanks.”

  She turned back around and picked up a napkin. “Dog slobber, uh!”

  “Mrn’t hrop it,” Nelson grunted.

  “Don’t talk with your mouth full. I don’t want to see that,” Nash complained.

  “Forry.”

  A disgusted, soft sigh sounded from Nash. Connie snorted in derisive amusement while handing Lexie hers.

  “I saw a motel a little ways back” Lexie offered.

  “I was thinking since we lost him on the highway headed this way, he's probably taken I-10.”

  “It’s as good a theory as any. So, you want to hop on I-10 and just head on towards California? We can pick up 66 from its end in Santa Monica.”