Route 666 Page 3

“Yup. Paper plates and stuff will probably be cheaper at the commissary. We should pick up a cooler too, while at the Exchange.”

  One not so quick trip to the Exchange and Commissary later, Connie’s phone rang. She glanced down at the screen as Lexie tipped the bagger after he loaded the bags into the trunk of the Thunderbird. It was Turner. She answered it. “You sobered up?” she asked, irritated. “We did not find that picture funny at all! What kind of man sends something like that to his sister?” she demanded.

  “Sorry, sorry,” he said. “I went to go see a guy I used to work with last night. We had some beers and he offered me some brownies he’d made. I saw an empty box of Ghiradelli Double Chocolate Brownies mix and an open container of Duncan Hines Whipped Chocolate frosting, so I thought they’d be okay. Things get a bit fuzzy after that so I’m hoping we don’t get a random drug test because I have a feeling he added something else to the mix and I don’t mean nuts.”

  “Oh my gosh! Are you serious? We thought you tied one on last night and were still rather lit but we never imagined that somebody drugged you!”

  Lexie spun around, keys in hand, eyes opened wide in shock. “Who did what now? You talking to Turner?”

  Connie nodded. “Somebody he used to work with fed him some special brownies only they didn’t tell him they were special. He saw a box of mix on the counter and assumed they were regular old brownies.”

  “That asshole! Who was it? I am gonna open me a can of whoop ass on whoever it is!” Lexie roared.

  “You gonna call the police?” Connie asked Turner.

  “No, because it’d be my word against his that I didn’t know and I could lose my job. Plus, he’d know it was me. I just won’t accept any food from him anymore if I see him.”

  “Okay. He better stay away though ‘cuz Lexie is spittin’ nails. She wants to go do a beat down.”

  “Tell her I’m all right and I can fight my own battles, thanks.”

  “Uh huh, or you can tell her yourself. We’re about to go to Blue Angel Park and barbecue, maybe rent a kayak and some boards, that sort of thing. You could join us.”

  “Sounds good. Let me shower first. See you in thirty?”

  “You betcha. We got everything we need, so just bring yourself.”

  “Okay. Love you and I am so, so sorry about earlier.”

  “Just don’t do it again. Now, bye and see ya in a bit.” She ended the call to find Lexie glaring at her. “What?” she asked her.

  “What was that? You find out who we need to go kill?”

  Connie sighed. “Just cool your jets, okay? He says he’s sorry, it was the brownies and beer talking earlier and that he can fight his own battles. He wants to handle it his way. Don’t make him feel small, okay? Anyways, he is hopping into the shower now and will join us in half an hour at the park. If we get our skates on instead of arguin’ in this parking lot, we can get to the park and get the charcoal going so it’ll start to ash over by the time he gets there.”

  Lexie deflated. “You’re right.” She unlocked the drivers side door, climbed in, and leaned over to unlock her sister’s door. “Come on, time’s a-wastin’.”

  The two women found the park easily enough and claimed their picnic spot and set the grill up. Connie was scrolling through her Amazon music account and building a playlist to stream through her portable speaker when a shadow fell over her and their brother’s familiar voice said, “See? I’m just fine. Lexie, Connie tell you I’m sorry?”

  “Yeah, she did. We’re good.”

  “Good, good,” Turner said, turning his attention back to Connie. “Whatcha doing? Texting anyone special?”

  “Naw, as if,” Connie rolled her eyes as she replied. “You know Samuel was it for me. I’m making a playlist so we can listen to some tunes while we eat.”

  “We could just play a station,” Lexie suggested.

  “No! They always play some songs I don’t wanna hear.” Connie pursed her lips.

  “Okay, okay,” Lexie replied, raising both hands in pacification. “Turner, you want a burger or a hot dog or both?” Lexie figured after the brownie incident, Turner and the munchies were probably well acquainted. Just remember the next time you send a dick pic, it better be a picture of Dick van Dyke or Richard Nixon, not a piece of anatomy.”

  “I hear you,” he said, looking away sheepishly towards the surf.

  “We didn’t go pick up any boards yet or nothin’. Why don’t you go pick us up some while Lexie cooks?”

  “A board?” he asked striding towards the water. “Why use a board when you can just call me Katrina and watch me walk on these waves?” He took a step out into the water where his sisters were astonished to see him begin dancing on top of the water. “Watch me dance in the sunshine! I can even mash it up!” he posed in the 80’s Egyptian walking dance pose. By now several others in the park had taken note of the antics.

  “Oh, Jesus!” a nearby woman cried out, pointing.

  “No, just me, Turner, though he did make walking on water famous!” he snarked.

  “You have got to be kidding me,” Lexie said, slack jawed, the open package of hot dogs in her hand all but forgotten. “First the damned car and now my brother goes all Exorcist and shit.”

  Connie dropped her phone onto the picnic table top and ran towards her brother. “Turner, get your ass back here! I don’t know what you’re playin’ at but someone is gonna call the MPs and we’ll get kicked off base!”

  “More like who he been channelin’” Lexie muttered.

  “Ohhh, you gonna call who?” he sang, prancing away, his feet skipping along the surf as if he was skipping a stone on a still pond, his eyes locked on a woman frantically reaching for her phone.

  A small crowd had gathered, their own cell phones held up as they eagerly filmed what they assumed was a YouTube prank. “I’m not kidding, Turner Lamont Dade. Get your fat ass back here. Don’t make me come get your ass!” Connie was in full swing.

  “Connie,” Lexie tried to get her attention. “I don’t think he’s playing. I think it’s like the car. You know- the car!” she hissed. “He’s channeling a spook or something.”

  “Listen to you,” Turner mocked Lexie. “She’s the one channeling somebody. Shouting at me like she’s Clairee Belcher!”

  That was the last straw. Connie strode out into the surf. Turner danced away backwards, this time singing the tune to Hawaii Five-O at the top of his lungs. Connie stopped when the water was waist high. “No, Turner stop!” She looked away when she saw it was too late. He danced backwards right into a parasailor who hadn’t even seen him coming.

  “Well, that’s torn it,” Lexie said. She reached over to call for emergency services. “I always knew he’d get himself killed one day pulling some damn spectacularly foolish stunt,” she muttered to herself, blinking away tears in vain. “Yes, hello…”

  Chapter 5

  Not The Yellow Brick Road

  “Given what you’ve explained about his actions at the park and his previous drinking and other activities, we’re going to keep him in for observation. He may have other things circulating in his system or it could be a bad reaction. We’re waiting on blood work to verify the drug that’s in his system still but he’s definitely not acting normal,” the doctor explained to Lexie.

  Connie spotted the doctor talking to Lexie and hurried over, paper cups of hospital coffee in hand. “Is he going to be okay?”

  The doctor turned to face her. “Amazingly, yes, they both are. I was just telling your sister that the only real concern we have now is the reaction your brother is obviously having to the substance your brother’s friend gave him. We’re keeping him in for observation to make sure he doesn’t get any worse and figure out exactly what it was he was slipped. We’ll have to notify the MPs and if it’s drugs, I’m afraid NCIS might even get involved, so just be prepared for that.”

  Yeah, I don’t think Gibbs would be equipped for this. Abby, maybe. Lexie pasted a smile onto her face. “Well, thank you f
or letting us know. Will we be able to call and get an update?”

  “Yes. They’re taking him up to a room now so if you’ll wait just a few minutes, I’ll have someone give you the information you need to check up on him.”

  “Okay, thanks.” Lexie accepted a cup from Connie and watched the doctor walk away. “You wait here, Con, while I go bring the car around.”

  “We’re not going to go sit with him? Is visiting hours over or something?”

  “Or something,” she told Connie, exasperation coloring her tone as she pondered Connie’s obliviousness. She took a swig of the coffee and made a face. It was terrible so she chucked it into a trashcan on her way through the front doors. Making her way across the parking lot, she scanned the aisles, trying to remember where she’d parked. Had there been this many cars earlier? She wasn’t sure, but the T-bird wasn’t easy to miss, thank goodness.

  She got in and reached into her purse, opening facebook and looking at Turner’s profile. “Somebody he used to work with,” she muttered, looking at his list of friends. Several coworkers were listed but one stood out. He’d tagged Turner the night before. “‘No hard feelings,’” she read. “‘Come over to mine for some brewskis?’ Bingo! Winner, winner, chicken dinner!” She put her phone away and drove up to the front of the hospital, where Connie was now waiting.

  “That was good timing!” Connie said. “I just got here.”

  “Good. We have a guy to go visit. But first, we need to find his address.”

  “Lexie, we should let the cops handle his friend.”

  “Con, did you not see what he was doing? Normal human beings can’t walk on water, let alone dance on it! That was straight up spooky ass bullshit. Any weirder and Buffy would have shown up, with the Winchesters in tow.”

  Connie swallowed and looked out the window. “You think Shane’s uncle got out of the car and attacked Turner?”

  “What? No! I do think there’s something in the water here, though. I’m sticking to bottled and canned drinks here on out, let me tell you.”

  “And you think his friend had something to do with it.”

  “Yeah, I do. Turner seemed normal right up until he had some beer and brownies with that guy.”

  “How do you even know who this guy is?”

  “Stupid asshole invited him by posting an invite right on his goddamned Facebook wall.”

  Connie’s eyes widened. “Seriously?”

  “As a heart attack, yeah. I just want to get back to the motel, put this food in the fridge and look this jerk up in the White Pages or whatever. I bet he’s not unlisted and if he’s not, his address will be right there too. I plan for us to pay him a visit. We find out what he did, then we can fix Turner.”

  “Okay, yeah. I’m in. But if it’s drugs and not voodoo or whatever, we leave and call the cops.”

  “Sure.” Connie heard Lexie agree but her tone suggested otherwise. She sighed. Connie decided she’d take what she could get.

  The ice had nearly all melted in the cooler by the time they got back to the motel. Luckily it had done its job and kept the food cool, though Lexie was feeling doubtful about the hamburger meat. She put it in the fridge for now deciding that she could always toss it out later. Right now, she had bigger fish to fry.

  She washed her hands and walked over to the desk in their room and sat down. Moments later, she was logged into a site with the information she needed and entering her payment information, seconds away from getting the address of the toe rag who had used some bad juju on their brother. You mess with one Dade, you mess with us all, she thought as the website gave up its secret. She rummaged in the desk drawer, quickly finding a cheap pen and pad of notepaper bearing the motel logo inside. She jotted down the address. “I got it, let’s go,” she told Connie.

  “Should we bring anything? On TV, if it’s supernatural, they bring something.”

  “Like what, Con? Our Saint Christopher medal? Going to try reading a passage out of the Gideon Bible from the bedside table?”

  The two sisters looked at each other. “Actually, that might not be a bad idea,” Connie said slowly. She walked over to the nightstand, finding there was indeed a Bible in there and took it out. “Bible, medal, some salt, and how about some sage? Maybe smudging will help or something.”

  “Sure, why not?” Lexie said. She passed her one of the paper bags from the commissary. “Put it all in here, that way, it’s all easy to get to.”

  “Okay,”Connie agreed, following her instructions. “We don’t have any sage though and the Saint Christopher’s is in the car still.”

  “I’m sure we can pick up some sage along the way. There’ll be a Piggly Wiggly or Winn Dixie or something on the way, I’m sure. Just get in the car.”

  “Does this guy live close by?”

  “Close enough,” Lexie replied, looking at the Google directions her phone was giving her after inputting the address. “Hang on, I can ask it for a supermarket. Uh huh, found one. Perfect.” Lexie rolled her neck and shoulders. “Come on, we got something or someone to go bust.”

  Connie looked alarmed. “No violence! You promised we’d call the cops if it wasn’t ghosts or whatever.”

  “I meant bust, like with ghosts.”

  “Oh. All right then. Let’s go, then,” Connie said, following her younger sister out the door while clutching the paper bag to her chest.

  A short detour to Walmart for sage and thirty-five minutes later, they pulled into a parking space in front of a set of cookie cutter condos. Lexie hated this kind of place. If you were going to buy a place, it should have some kind of character to it and not look like a generic pictorial definition of boring. She turned the ignition off and got out, not caring that her door slammed.

  “Hey, easy!” Connie chided her, also getting out of the car. “You don’t want to disturb everybody.”

  “Like I give a rat’s ass right now,” Lexie growled. “Just come on. I want to get this over with.”

  They walked up a short paved path between two buildings to a third. A small dog yipped as it dashed down the path between their legs. “Looks like somebody’s dog got out.”

  “Don’t worry about that right now. Turner is in the hospital, probably drugged and with a demon or some shit in him. Little more important at the moment!”

  Connie glanced over her shoulder and sighed. She knew Lexie was right, but she still worried about the dog. What if he got hit by a car? “Okay, but if he’s still around when we come out, we should catch him and find out who he belongs to.”

  “Yeah, sure,” Lexi said, walking up a flight of stairs to the second floor. “This is it, Number 2B.” She knocked loudly. The door opened, a young man in his early twenties eying the two women from head to toe as they stood before him.

  “You don’t look like Jehovah's,” he said.

  “We’re not,” Lexie said, pushing past him. She glanced about his living room. She didn’t see anything occult like there, so she went farther into his apartment.

  “Hey, what are you doing?” he shouted.

  “Don’t you yell at her like that!” Connie said, pushing her finger into his face. “That’s no way to talk to a lady!”

  “Ladies don’t just come busting into a guy’s apartment,” he countered.

  “Well, if we told you we were here to talk to you about how you drugged poor Turner and put the hoodoo on him, you wouldn’t have let us in, now would you?” Connie said, narrowing her eyes.

  He gulped. “Are you crazy? I didn’t drug nobody and what the hell do you mean, put the hoodoo on?”

  “In here,” called Lexie, from the bedroom.

  “Mm hmm,” Connie said to him reprovingly as he paled and whirled around to go see what Lexie had found. Connie was right behind him.

  “Will you look at that?” Lexie said, pointing to a dresser against one wall. Connie stared.

  “I don’t know what you think you’ve found, but I’m gonna have to ask you to leave,” he said, straightening his spine a
nd trying to look authoritative.

  “Like hell,” Connie said. “Is that a toaster oven in the middle of a pentagram on that dresser?”

  “Looks like,” Lexie agreed.

  “Now why would you even do that, especially in a bedroom? You’ve got a perfectly good kitchen,” she reproved.

  “Lack of counter space,” he replied, then winced as he realized what he’d just admitted to. “Okay, fine, I used a spell. He deserved it, though. I mixed up two batches of brownies, baked the ones for me in the kitchen and the other one I did for him in here. I figured that calling on Marduk to make the pot extra potent and making him super loopy would serve him right. He got me fired.”

  “Asking who to do what now?” Connie asked, confused.

  “Marduk is an ancient Babylonian god,” Lexie informed her. She turned to the young man. “Are you stupid? You thought you’d just draw a pentagram and whammo blammo, he’d be extra stoned?”

  “Well, yeah,. I ordered a book from Amazon to make sure I got the design and prayer right and everything.”

  “A book from Amazon.” Lexie looked at him disbelievingly. “Anyone with a sound mind doesn't play with that shit. How would you even know it was real?”

  “Yep. It’s by Zorastus Bingley, that’s how I know it’s legit. He’s got this website and it talks about all this stuff, but if you want the deep details, you have to get his book.”

  “Zorastus Bingley. Who the hell is that?” Lexie asked in disbelief. “Hello, made up name for making a quick buck off a naive dumb ass.”

  “He’s an expert in the occult!” the young man yelled.

  “Hey, what did I tell you about talking to my sister like that?” Connie shouted back.

  “Fuck off,” he told her, a breeze ruffling his floppy blond hair.

  “You smell that?” Lexie asked.

  “Did you fart?” Connie asked the man. “That’s some rank ass shit right there.” The breeze picked up, tossing loose papers on the bed about. The two women gagged. “Lexie, You brought the medal?”